DIY: Needlepoint Gifts — the little onion

I learned to cross-stitch when I was 5, so it's a been a hobby of mine for as long as I can remember. Like knitting, there's something soothing about doing the same thing over and over and getting to watch your progress. As an adult, I’ve developed an affinity for funny or sarcastic patterns. The juxtaposition of an irreverent or unexpected phrase written in such an antiquated art form just kills me. If you’re ever bored, just search for funny cross stitch on Pinterest. Even Buzzfeed thinks it’s funny, and they’re never wrong.

Here are a few items I’ve made for gifts in the past few years.

HOLD ME

I made this beauty for a former boss/friend of mine when I quit (sowwy...) because we used this phrase relentlessly. It had many different meanings.

"I got 3 hours of sleep last night" >> Hold me
"I have 7 hours of meeting on my calendar today" >> Hold me
"John Doe is making me want to throw myself out of a window again" >> Hold me
“I feel like I’m taking crazy pills” >> Hold me

GEOLOGY

This was for another co-worker who always used to say that his job was just liquor and guessing. I thought that was so funny, so I made him this little number.

SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE

My sister-in-law shares my love of subversive art and she pinned this, so I made it for her for a birthday.

FAMILY PORTRAIT

This one’s sweeter than it is snarky, but my darling little cousin got married earlier this year so I made this of her little family (including puppy Thor!) as a topper for her wedding gift. I had to piece together the people (and dog) that look most like them through lots of Pinterest and Google searches, but in the end it looked just like them!

SODIUM CUTE

My most recent project is this cute little salt and pepper pun. I found this on Pinterest and knew I had to have a version of it hanging on my dining room wall. I’m working on a big vintage spread in there, and want to have a few of these related to food mixed with milk glass plates and old cake tins. Stay tuned!